I was sick yesterday. Had a fever. I feel a need to see doc. But no 1 can help to relieve me , in d end I asked a fren for help. Then I informed Hb and he blamed me to cause him lose concentration in his job. I din understand. I tot I can inform him that I am sick and need to see doc. What is wrong with that? Dun tell me if wife sick, Co will condemn him? I am so disappointed with him.

Patience? How to find it to handle him? I cant. And I very sick yesterday. We quarrelled over the phone and I tore up the mrc and wanted a divorce. I am tired.

He came back home not asking how my fever was in d end picking a quarrel. This time triggered over by his mum. Just a phone call in the noon made him feel good towards his mum. And me is the petty and evil one. Evil wife and daugterin law. He can blamed me for not being extra nice to his mum. He asked me why cant I be Extra Nice to her!!!? And he can tell me If i nice to her, she sure ll be treat me gd!!! Hello, In what way has I offended his mum? Right frm the start, where? He knew his folks dun treat me gd yet today I look the petty one to him. Nice? In what way has I not nice to his mum? He knew and he cant answer me!

I told HB' I dun owe yr mum anythg, neither has I screamed at her or being rude like that, I merely chose my own way, ie. keeping quiet and dun wish to talk to them, what's wrong with that? Your Mum's words hurt and I dun need that to aggravate my depression and all the more I dun deserve that. I am a sensitive person.

Till today HB dun understand. He said he never get to see all this. So does it mean I am making it all up and accuse yr mum's character? Well fine, If i am really that bad, then go back to Yr mother, and we go separate way. I asked for a divorce. I am very hurt and sad to think my own hb can see me until like that.

I am having fever, no concern no care yet kena blamed. What M i ? Tired, I wished I can leave and go.I wished to give up everythg or God can take me away. I hve done so much for this family. I dun expect returns and want a bit of care and concern and yet this is what I get. I feel myself so small. Perhaps so small until my existence doesnt matter anymore.